2010

Twenty-Ten.

Anybody have any new years resolutions?

I just plan not be so handicapped by my laziness.

Hollywood

I've recently had the pleasure of experiencing my first dreaded Hollywood experience. If you didn't know, now you do, I'm in the middle of shooting a music video for this band called What Seas What Shores, a local band in Windsor. My hometown.

I'm pseudo-friends with the members of this band, although i respect the music and thoroughly enjoy it, I got this job because of our relationship. The star of this picture is also a friend of mine, friends since high school, friends till the end. He recently, the friend in the video attended a social thrown by the members of the band, he subsequently got drunk off hard liquor and asked some cheeky puma to polish his fireman's pole unbenowest that she was already spoken for by a good friend of the band.

tension tension, druuummm roll

Fight ensued. Nobody is happy with high school friend.

And I'm left with a few, in my opinion, impressive reels of footage with my friend being the center of attention. I don't really want to get rid of it. So I made my apologies on his behalf and mine, however the band is torn, with the majority in favour of him not being in it. So what do i do? I say fuck it. I'm going keep working on it with him in it, because my idea is to just make something so fucking good it will impress these people no matter what, it will transcend all of the bickering and hypnotise them. That is the dream. Besides the guys a mate, what can you do?

If not though, I'm willing to make adjustments in posts. I was thinking of darkening the face or something. I'm open to all suggestions really. Throw a dart attached with a piece of a paper with an idea written on it at the dartboard. You get three darts for free.

I'm shooting some driving scenes today. I'm going to include a from the gas pedal action shot, inspired by a shot in Godzilla vs. Megalon, that I vowed to put into one of my directorial efforts.

Anyway, this company is flaming zeppelin and I'm going to ride crashing and burning into the ground.

Cheap - A Modest Movie

I've recently sat through the film Cheap. An independent production written and directed by Brad Jones. That name might sound familiar depending on whether or not you watch his popular independent web series "The Cinema Snob", which revolves around him ripping apart subpar films from the past couple of decades. You might like it, I do, it puts a smile on my face, you might not, you might have forgotten how to smile, but that is another demon.

So let us talk cheap!

Where to begin? I guess you can claim that the film is aptly named.
It’s shot on a home video camera. It has a cast composed largely of friends and non-trained actors. I assume so alteast. Uses Minimal Lighting. Yes
However, if you rely solely on aesthetics to enjoy a film, then you are exercising poor judgment or you must be in high school and liked Law Abiding Citizen. Aesthetics are not what movies are about, it’s about telling a story. That’s what keeps you captivated; it’s that thing that happens that makes you pay attention to somebody when they are telling you a good ghost story. It has to have suction; you have to be sucked in.

I can happily say that the story driving Cheap sucks. It is so fucking fresh, I can only compare it to a profusely bleeding, infected gash in your abdomen that you can smell so vividly you'll remember till the day you die. And that my friends is a quality in films, rarely seen in modern movies drowning in a tidal wave of money, visual trickery, and blue tigers.

After a sadistic opening credit sequence, that I won’t dare to spoil for you here, perfectly sets the tone from the rest of the film we open up on one of the titular characters. The aptly named Max Force, the proprietor of a successful internet pornography production/distribution company fucking Natalie Nickels, a shell of a once top billed porn starlet turned drug addict looking to get her old job back. Max has no issues expressing his disgust towards Nickels, degrading her as he tells her she lacks the qualities to even be a star on a the sinking ship that is the pornography industry, before telling her to fuck off. It’s obvious, by the undercurrents of boredom reverberating in Max’s voice, his unsatisfied views towards his once beloved industry, his uncaring demeanor after a casual fucking and degrading, that Max has been saturating in filth and vices for so long that it’s practically embodied him. Fucking is as regular to him as eating breakfast is in the morning, he’s completely desensitized, So he looks for something new something so shocking, so next level that it breaks the monotony that is his life. Wouldn’t we all?

This segways into the next character, the dreamer Jack Stone, and an ex-porn director under Force’s stable, that shares Maxi boy’s sentiments with boredom over the lack luster offerings of the porn industry.

How often can you show people fucking and in how many different ways? And with what and in where.

It’s getting stale and it’s getting cliché and Mr. Jack Stone is certainly not either of those things, he is a visionary, a pioneer, who’s vision is going to elevate the industry to the next era.

Jack’s Vision: Snuff Film. The new era. The evolution towards violence seems to be the next logical step. In an age of Internet pornography being so easily accessible it’s dissolved all taboo’s surrounding it, it seems obvious to venture in the realms of violence and test those limits as well.

Jack subsequently recruits a film crew composed of two runaway girls and a pedophile to help him bring his cinematic dreams into fruition. After a successful shoot, Jack’s crew presents the movie to Max, who is fascinated by it, Max cuts a deal with Jack and contracts him to make more, while silently ordering hack director Derek Diamond to shoot rip-offs. Thus a beautiful relationship is born, that slowly descends into the hell mouth after Maxi Boy gets too involved with out of Jack’s crew that leads to climax that is so dark it has to been seen to be believed.
Among a cast of great staring and supporting characters, David Gobbles as Max Force and Writer Director Brad Jones as Jack Stone steal the show. Gobbles is a presence, sitting silently, gazing coldly, misleading with a calm demeanor that houses a ticking time bomb ready to explode at any moment. Jones’ does a sociopath, so insane, so innocent in his aspirations, so child like that it almost makes you sympathize with his homicidal rampage, this guy makes you realize why people could follow Charlie Mason. He can fuck you and kill you at the same time.

Kudos to Victor Roebuck, for his excellent throwback mo-town musical choices, that instill uneasiness and dread when juxtaposed with Miles Thorne’s bleak, washed out, low quality images (the end result is great). These kids have found the soul cinema (something those dogme 95 guys were trying to do back in the day), bludgeoned it to unconsciousness, and cut it's throat in front of a camera and distributed the footage over the Internet.

Watch the Footage Here

I will soon deliver the milk to pour onto your dry cereal.

Top ten coming tomorrow, around 4 o'clock eastern standard time.

Who even reads this shit anyway?
I feel like I'm communicating to an inanimate object

Well here are some suggestions for listening:
Download or Buy the following albums

Crystal Antlers - Crystal Antlers
Animal Collective - Marriweather Post Pavilion
Pulp - Freaks
RJD2 - Dead Ringer

I'll be posting ideas from my head.
I'll be treating this thing like my job soon, I promise.

Home is the Darkness

Sorry about the wait, it's been a hell of a week. I literally have had papers growing out of my ass for the past week. I'm pretty much done all of them, left are only a few stragglers, a few pockets of resistance.

Their time is coming. I assure you.

It's really my fault, I basically live on deadlines without them I am nothing. As Charles Bukowski said: My ambition is handicapped by my laziness.

I'm going to try and fit in a psed0-film review next week, aswell as a top 10 something. So anticipate that.


Anyway, I'm currently working on a music video for a band local band Called "What Seas What shores" they're a cool little operation in the vein of explosions in sky/godspeed! you black emperor. Really cool medlodic, dream like music that borders on the emotions you might feel the first time you got laid to a phone call from the morgue.

Here's there myspace:
What Seas What Whores

These blokes are releasing a new CD soon, so be sure to check that out. I believe that their body of work is on iTunes store if you're really interested.

P.S. The song I'm doing a video for is called "Siren Radio" it's off the album "Threnodies"

And Start West

Hi.
I'm currently a second year student and the University of Windsor, in Windsor, Ontario. I study communications studies there, which is a basically a failed free throw of a frankenstein film program. This is all a shame, because I always felt this city had so much character to be captured on film.It's bleak, industrial and unappealing, if somebody took a decent birds eye fiew picture of this city it would embody a nine inch nails metaphor. Living in windsor, or anywhere in ontario for that matter is the worst place to live if your alcoholic.

Getting to the heart of this thing.

If you have guessed already, I'm somewhat of a film maker/pop-culture enthusiast. These two areas of interest are very impressive to me, I consider them great contributions from the human race and when I'm depressed I usually engulf myself in them to make myself feel better, that or I talk to my girlfriend on the phone...all over her tits.

I hate using ellipses it makes me and everybody else sound like conceited prick. So I apologize for that.

I'm not good at making movies, I'm no steve spielberg I only got into this shit because I have a vivid imagination that required an outlet and I suck at drawing.

I'm in the fledgling, embryonic stage of creating a production company called "Blam!Blam!Blam!", which basically means I had business cards printed.

This blog is going to be a scatter shot attempt at some sort of primo suave ultra underground pop culture editorial. (expect rants, reviews, my art, recommendations, dick jokes, and the chronicling of the rise and fall of my company)

I'm currently working on a website, with art done by this guy Jakub "gnarlybog" Tits
This kid is a mega talent, we used to be in a band.

It was nice meeting you.